Raindrops Keep Falling
by Becca Bing
Summary: A divorce and a marriage gone wrong - what now? (C&M) Please read and review, thanks!:)
1. Chapter 1

**Raindrops Keep Falling** – Chapter 1

Hey all! I'm back with a new fic! Yay, excitingness! I'm, of course, nervous about starting this fic, b/c, well, new fics always make me nervous. But, my ickle Yenni convinced me that it would be ok, so I'm posting. Ok, here's what you need to know: this takes place during the would be 4th season and nothing's happened between Monica and Chandler and everything that happened the real 4th season…didn't happen. No Emily, no London, and so on. This chapter is very short, especially for something I've written, but it kinda has to be. So, here we go. I hope it'll be worth continuing. Please read and review, thanks!:)

**Disclaimer: **Hmm…let's see…I own the Chicago movie (which, btw, I cannot watch without noticing how big Queen Latifa's breasts are, YENNIFER! And then I start comparing them to the other characters and…yeah…grrr), I own 4/5 Harry Potters, 3 seasons of Friends, but…the characters, are sadly not mine.:( Oh, and neither are the words to Raindrops Keep Failling. 

**Raindrops keep falling on my head,   
But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turning red****  
  
**

Monica sang those words softly, as she slid under the Mickey Mouse covers of the bed below her. After she was settled, she placed a hand on the back of the child next to her. Remaining in the same curled up position facing the opposite wall for a few more moments, she moved in closer and continued to sing. 

**Crying's not for me, 'cause   
I'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining****  
  
**

The small boy turned over on his back slowly, and stared up at the ceiling. Then, as if dreading it, he faced his mother with an innocently frightened look upon his face. She kissed his cheek, her heart breaking at the familiarity of that look and the familiarity of that situation. 

**So, I just did me some talking to the sun   
And I said I didn't like the way he got things done****  
  
**

Monica stopped singing and drew her son closer to her in a tight embrace, only to hear the sound of faint moans coming from behind the wall in front of them. Remembering how important it was for her to sing, she continued the tune. 

**Sleeping on the job, those   
Raindrops are falling on my head,******

Bed springs squeaked and Monica pulled the boy as close as she possibly could to her body, allowing him to cover his face with her shoulder. She moved her lips next to his ear, allowing the feel of her breath against his ear to sooth away the pain. She felt his small arms wrap around her back and realized, that in her own attempt to soothe her son, he was trying to comfort her, as well.    
  


**They keep falling******

**but there's one thing I know:   
The blues they send to meet me   
Won't defeat me**

Even if Monica wanted to believe the words she sang, it didn't matter. The words had blended into a whirlpool of swirling worries and pain. With her song, she was expressing every emotion she kept pent up deep inside her soul. And, as the grunts and moans sifted through the air, she fought them with the only weapon she had – her words. 

**It won't be long 'til happiness steps   
Up to greet me**

As she held her son in her arms and he held her in his, she wondered how much he understood. Obviously, he knew enough to be afraid. He saw the sadness in his mother's eyes and knew that her sorrow was his as well. But did he know of what the man he was supposed to be able to trust unconditionally was doing in the room adjacent to his? Did he know of the utter betrayal that blacked his heart? Or did he just know that no other woman, aside from mommy, was supposed to be in his father's bedroom?

**Raindrops keep falling on my head   
And just like the guy whose feet are too big   
For his bed,**

The sounds in the other room grew louder and more demanding than ever, and Monica encompassed her son in her arms as tight as she could. It wasn't fair – he was only five years old, yet he had to face the horrors of the world in his very own home.  She was trying to protect him from the horrors that darkened her life. Every fiber of her body yearned to save him from learning the feeling of betrayal. 

  
**Nothing seems to fit, those   
Raindrops are falling on my head,   
They keep falling******

And as the groans and moans of momentary pleasure reached their height, she allowed her voice to rise as loud as it could. She bellowed out the words as if her life depended on it.. Nothing else mattered at that moment, but her words. She had to keep singing, keep singing, or else the world would end. It was the absolute moment of truth, where nothing else existed but those notes and her son's small form below her. 

**Yeah, but I'm free   
And nothing's worrying me   
It won't be long 'til happiness steps   
Up to greet me**

And then, the birds began to chirp again, the moon began to glow again, and the world began to move again. At that moment, the other room became silent. And, at that same moment, Monica became silent.

A door creaked open and creaked shut again. High heels clomped against the wooden stairs. Another door opened and shut again a moment later. 

The boy's arms dropped from Monica's body, and, in turn, she let go of him. She swept a strand of dark hair from his eyes and kissed his pale forehead. She walked towards the door and shut off the light. 

"Good night, Alex," she whispered.

Monica left the bedroom and crept across the wooden hallway. She arrived at the door and grasped the cold, brass knob between her fingers, merely holding it for a moment. She wanted to run away, but she knew she couldn't. Instead, she turned the handle slowly, the last lines of that same song playing in her head. 

**Raindrops keep falling on my head,   
That doesn't mean my eyes will soon be   
Turning red —   
Crying's not for me, no   
I'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining,   
Because I'm free,   
Nothing's worrying me**

So, should I continue? It really feels good to be back to writing Chandler and Monica, hehe. Ok, please review, thanks!:)


	2. Chapter 2

**_Raindrops Keep Falling_**_ – Chapter 2_

**_A/N: _**_Chapter two is here, my friends!:) Everything will be clear soon, I promise. I just want to change one thing. This doesn't actually **take place **during season 4, nor did everything before that season turn out the way it actually did on the show. I cannot, however, tell you what is different at the moment. You shall see soon enough…or someone could ruin it for you *glares at Yen*. Don't do that again!:-p Nah, you've been a big help with this fic. Love ya my monkey buddy who just logged offline 2 minutes ago! So, just read and hopefully, things will become clearer. If not, I'll explain more as this fic progresses. Also, this chapter doesn't directly fit with the last one, but they will connect soon enough. I'm just warning you – it has a very different mood to it than the last chapter. Anyways, thanks for the great reviews! Ok, on with the show. Please read and review, thanks!_

Chandler took a huge swig of his beer and then slammed the brown bottle down on the table, knocking two empty bottles over in the process. Startled by the noise of glass breaking, Joey turned away from the girl he was flirting with and studied his distraught friend.  

"Hey man, you'd better ease up on the drinking."

"Don't worry 'bout it, Joe." Chandler attempted to pat him on the back, but ended up falling off the chair instead. "Whoa, the world moved," Chandler remarked from his spot on the floor.

Joey sighed dramatically and grabbed Chandler's hand in an attempt to help him back onto his chair. The two struggled for a moment. Chandler wasn't making any movement to get up, forcing Joey to lift him and his full body weight. Joey then glanced to his left and groaned. The woman he was trying to coax into leaving with him had indeed left – but without him.  

"I'm a freeeeee man, Joe. Freedom!" Chandler raised his hands in jubilation, "Free from that wicked witch of the west at last!"

"Wicked witch of the—ohhh." He laughed at Chandler's words, and then quickly sobered, "Yeah, but come on! Celebrating's one thing…but this…this is getting awfully close to alcohol poisoning!" 

"You worry too much."

Joey chuckled. "I highly doubt that."

"Here," Chandler held out an empty beer bottle, "Have a beer. It'll be on me."

Joey took the beer and then gave Chandler a baffled look. "It's empty."

"Hey, I never said I would give you a full beer! A guy's gotta eat, ya know."

Joey shook his head and replaced the beer onto the table. 

"Uh-oh, what's this?"

"What's what?"

"THIS!" Chandler remarked, holding his hand in front of Joey's face.

"A…hand?" 

"No, no, no. It's a wedding ring! I gotta, I gotta get rid of this."

"Chandler, maybe you should—" Joey paused and watched as Chandler tried fruitlessly to slip off his wedding band. "Or just yank it off."

"The damn thing won't come off!" 

"Maybe you should go to the bathroom sink and run it under some water?"

Chandler snapped his fingers in amazement. "Joey, you're so smart! When did you get to be so smart?"

"I dunno, I—" Chandler began to stick his finger into his mouth and pull at the wedding band with his teeth. "That's not what I told you to do!"

"Ya, but," Chandler mumbled with his ring finger still shoved in his mouth, "I dun feel like getin' up." 

Joey signed in resignation. "Whatever, man."

After deciding that his mouth wasn't going to get the ring off, he stuck it into his beer bottle. Joey watched Chandler, trying hard to stifle his laughter. For once, Chandler was the one making a fool out of himself. Joey was relishing in this event, because, while sober, it was almost always the other way around. 

"Shit, I'm wasting priceless booze!" Chandler admonished and then licked his finger clean, "Thanks for the great advice, _Joey_."

"What?! I didn't tell you to use your be—" Realizing that there was no use defending himself he resigned, "I'm sorry." 

Chandler nodded, accepting his apology, and then turned to a couple at the next table. Sitting there was a brown- haired, well-built man in his early 20's and a big-busted, blonde-haired woman of about the same age. 

"Excuse me, Miss," Chandler began in the most formal tone he could muster, "Would you mind if I stuck my finger in your mouth?"

Upon hearing Chandler's request, Joey slapped his forehead in frustration. Then, he noticed the boyfriend stand up and walk angrily over towards Chandler, so he slipped away to the back. Joey watched in horror as the man punched Chandler in the face, leaving a fresh mark directly above his left eye, and then shoved him, before leaving the bar.  

Chandler made no attempt to rise from his position on top of the table that he was forcefully pushed on top of. Once Joey was sure the man left, he returned to Chandler with a bag of ice in his hand. Chandler put it on his eye and mumbled a thank you. 

"Wanna go home now?" Joey tried.

"No, no, no!" Chandler got off of the table and then sat back on his chair. He raised his hand and snapped his fingers, "Waitress! Another beer!"

Joey looked around, wondering if anyone had heard his order. Deciding no one had, Joey went to the bar and grabbed two beers. He returned to Chandler and handed it to him.

"Thanks, sir," he responded, giving Joey a quarter. 

"Dude, it's me."

"And it's _me_."

Joey sighed and fell upon one of the brown chairs exhaustedly. Chandler learned over and studied him for a moment.

"I'm saving this seat for my friend. Besides, shouldn't you be working?"

Joey sighed and turned away from Chandler, realizing that it was going to be an incredibly long and difficult night. 

Chandler groaned as he opened his sleep-crusted eyes. Normally, the morning sunlight made Chandler feel more at ease and ready for a new day. However, on this morning, all it served to do was feed his rapidly growing headache. After a few futile attempts at rising, he sat up and swung his feet off the edge of the bed. Then, he found his boxers and a t-shirt lying haphazardly on the floor. After smelling them and deciding they were clean enough, he put them on. He then noticed a note on his nightstand, and curiously picked it up He slowly unfolded the note and a twenty-dollar bill fell out and floated onto his bare feet.  

_Hey, _it read,_ thanks for the great night. _

_The great night? _Chandler wondered, utterly baffled, _What does that - ohhhh. _His eyes widened at his revelation and he left his bedroom as quickly as his painful hangover would allow him to move.

"Joey! Joey!" he called while pounding on Joey's bedroom door. However, the noise just made his head hurt more, so he stopped knocking and groaned angrily. 

"'Mornin' sunshine," Joey sang irritably, "Have a good night?"

"Uch…terrible. But please, oh please, tell me I was with a woman last night!"

Joey smiled teasingly as he made his way towards the kitchen counter. 

"Joey!"

"It was a woman."

"Ok, phew," Chandler let out a sigh of relief. 

"She was pretty damn ugly though."

"Oh well. Ya know, she paid me twenty bucks."

Joey almost chocked on the orange juice that he poured for himself just moments before. "Seriously?!"

Chandler showed him the note and held out the bill. "Yup."

"Wow, she must've thought _real _highly of you," Joey quipped.

"Hey, I was good!"

"You don't even remember it!"

"Well, I was good enough for her to pay me," Chandler mumbled. 

"Yeah? So what's your ongoing rate?" Off Chandler's angry look he added, "How much do extras cost? Do you remove bras with your teeth?"

"Why do you wanna know?" 

"Hey," he punched Chandler playfully on the shoulder and stole the twenty from his grasp, "Gotta know what I'm up against."

"Yeah, well, that's _my _twenty! I earned it."

"Sure ya did. But then you lost it after your client stole my stereo."

"What?" Chandler looked around the room, and noticed the stereo missing from its spot on the far wall. "Hey man," he began somberly, "I'm really sorry. I'd pay you back, but after the divorce, you know I have no money…but I'll earn it and take out a loan and—"

Joey smiled reassuringly, filled a glass with orange juice, and handed it to Chandler. "Don't worry 'bout it. It's the least I can do for you after all you've done for me before. Besides," he learned in close to Chandler and lowered his voice, "If it were the TV, I'd be a hell of a lot angrier. I figure I gotta pick my fights."

"Thanks man."

"Just don't be bringing home women like that anymore!" Joey scolded, "I'd hate to make you live with Ross. 

Chandler moaned before forcefully swallowed two painkillers. 

"Can't you just hear the air purifier humming in the distance?"

"All right, all right. I get the picture." 

"Good." Joey paused and looked around, "Now, about that woman paying you…do you think _I _could make some money off of sex?" 

Chandler rolled his eyes and retreated into his bedroom.

"What?" he called through Chandler's bedroom door, "It only makes sense that I should get paid for what I do best!" 

_All right, there ya have it – chapter 2. Hope it was okay. Well, please leave me a review. Thanks for reading!:)_


	3. Chapter 3

**_Raindrops Keep Falling_**  - Chapter 3

_Hey, update time! Thanks for the great reviews for the last chapter. Ok, am updating during my [very short] break from my English project, so I'll try to make this quick. I didn't procrastinate – quite the opposite, in fact. The problem, however, is the fact that we were given only two days to do this project **on top of **other work from my English teacher. There was only so much I could do last night, ya know? Bleh, she's gonna be a bundle of joy *rolls eyes*. Well, hopefully, things will start to clear up, in terms of this fic. Pay attention for little clues for the back-story. I'm not gonna come right out and say it 'cuz, well, what's the fun in that?!:p All right, please read and review, thanks!:) (P.S. Yen, I miss u! Damn the computer! Damn all the computers! …wait, I didn't mean that! *hugs her computer* I love u Mr. Computer. Don't be mean and freeze.)_

Later that morning, the gang, minus Chandler, gathered in Central Perk. Joey, sitting in the arm chair furthest from the door, was describing Chandler's behavior during the night before to the others, glancing up at the door every once in a while, in order to ensure Chandler never overheard their conversation. Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross sat on the couch, listening to the story, three pairs of incredulous eyes bulging. Monica, however, sat in other armchair, while listening to the story and casually sipping coffee. 

 "Wow, he was really _that _drunk?" Ross wondered, "I mean that isn't like something Chandler would normally do."

"Yeah, but," Phoebe rationalized, "He doesn't normally get divorced, either."

"True."

"Besides," Rachel cut in, "You remember how hard divorces be. I'm sure you got just as, if not more drunk than Chandler did when you got divorced."

"Yeah, you're right," Ross agreed, and then added under his breath, "I never got _drunker _than him." 

"Whatever, I'm still worried about him," said Joey.

"Yeah, we all are. Hey, Ross," Phoebe turned to him, "Have you tried to talk to him about the divorce, since, well, you've been divorced before and all?" 

"No, I haven't. I mean I've tried, but he won't talk about anything. It's almost like he's in denial half the time."

"It's not denial," Monica muttered, "It's an inability to _accept _the present as his own."

"Isn't that denial?" Phoebe wondered.

"No, it's not. Denial is refusing to accept it. He knows the reality – just can't make it his own. It's a lot easier to separate life from reality." 

The other four stared back at Monica with baffled looks upon their faces. She sighed, resigning, and went back to sipping her coffee while merely listening to the conversation.

"What do you think we can do for him?" Joey asked. 

"Nothing, except be there for him. Take it from someone who knows, the best medicine is time for wounds to heal."

"Yeah, I guess. It's just…it's so hard to see him like this!"

Rachel leaned over and rubbed Joey's arm soothingly. "I know, Honey. But he'll get over it soon, don't worry."

"I hope so."

After that, the four friends turned to a different, lighter topic. Monica, however, could no longer pay attention. Her thoughts continued to focus on Chandler. He had been unwilling to open up about any of his problems to anyone, since the divorce. Instead, all he had done for the past three months was go to work and then come home, change into his sweatpants, and mope around the apartment. Of course, that changed last night, when Chandler finally agreed to go out for some drinks with Joey. Perhaps, they should look at that night as an accomplishment on Chandler's part, instead of something else to worry about. However, it was hard to, given how completely out of his nature it was for him to get that drunk. 

"You know what," Monica began, completely oblivious to the fact that she had interrupted a story Phoebe was telling, "I'm gonna go visit Chandler and see how he's doing." 

"Okay, but I wouldn't make too many cracks at him 'cause I did and he's mad at me now." 

"Joey!" Admonished Rachel.

"What?! I was only kidding!"

"Okay, I won't. I'll see you guys later."

The others said goodbye to Monica, and watched as she left the coffee house. After making sure she was completely gone, Rachel turned back towards the group and sighed. 

"Something's been wrong with her lately, too."

"Yeah," Phoebe agreed, "Oh! I bet it's that sleaze bag husband of hers." 

The others mumbled in agreement. 

"Yeah, I'm really worried about her," Ross explained, "But there's nothing we can do. We have no signs that it's her husband that's made her become so distant. I mean, when someone asks about the marriage, she claims it's going well, but I dunno, there just seems to be something fake about it…"

Joey nodded enthusiastically. "Ya know, I didn't trust that guy from the start, but ever since she forgave him after he –"

 Joey stopped talking when he heard someone clear their throat. He looked up and blushed profusely, upon seeing Monica in front of him. 

"Forgot my purse," she muttered. 

After grabbing it from its place on the floor next to the coffee table, she looked around at the four of them. They all looked back at her with the same nervous, guilty look. She then turned on her heel sharply and walked back out the door, leaving four sheepish looks behind her.

Monica knocked lightly on the door a few times, but received no answer. Instead, she opened the door to the apartment and slipped in quietly. She looked around the room and noticed Chandler, sitting on the barkalounger and staring at a blank television screen. 

"Chandler?"

He mumbled something incoherently, without even turning to face Monica. She walked over to him and sat on the arm of the chair, watching him curiously. 

"Have you come here to lecture me about moving on, too?" he asked coldly.

"No, I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"So, Joey told you about last night, then?"

"Yeah, he did."

"Oh," Chandler looked away shamefully, "I would never have done something like that, but –"

"I know. You don't have to explain to me. I understand."

Chandler finally turned to look at her. "Really? You – you don't think I'm just some…depressed, worthless…person?" 

Monica took Chandler's hand in hers and stroked it with her thumb. "The only person who thinks that is _you_."

"Yeah, but, I mean, it's been _three months_."

"Things like that take more than just three months to get over."

"Yeah, I – I guess you're right." 

She squeezed the hand she was holding, "Of course I am."

"Thanks. It's just…nothing."

"What is it? Chandler, you can talk to me."

He took in a deep, shaky breath, "I never thought it would end."

"I'm so sorry, sweetie."

"I mean we fought, but…I never thought…she would suggest divorce. I mean…I had to say yes, though. You can't just turn down divorce when you know your wife wants it. It would eat you up inside…"

"One would think," Monica mumbled.

"What?"

Monica blushed and covered up her comment, "I know what you mean."

 "We were in love, or at least I thought we were. But we couldn't have loved each other, if we let those stupid fights get between us, could we?"

"I think you could've. I think you can fall out of love. The divorce doesn't mean you and Kathy never loved each other – it just means it wasn't meant to be." 

Chandler nodded blankly.

"Oh, come here," Monica cooed, opening his arms for him. 

He allowed himself to be enveloped in her tight embrace. He covered his face on her shoulder, as uncontrollable tears began to flow down his cheeks.  Monica held him closer and rubbed his back soothingly. 

After a few minutes, Chandler pulled back, eyes puffy and pink-brimmed. Monica rubbed his arm and offered him an encouraging smile. He smiled back meekly. 

"I didn't mean to start crying like that…"

"Don't be embarrassed. It's good for you."

"Yeah, but –"

"Don't worry about what anyone, besides yourself, thinks," she told him, "You're the only one who matters."

Chandler nodded. "Thanks, I – you really helped today."

Monica smiled and blushed, "I'm glad. You have to talk to people more!"

This time, Chandler blushed and looked down at his lap. "It's hard."

"I know."

They sat in silence for a moment, before Chandler continued, "What about you?"

"What about me?" 

"You tell me that I need to open up, but…what about you?"

"I talk to people."

Chandler gave her a look of disbelief, but said, "Okay." 

"Marriage is just…hard sometimes. I mean, you know."

"Yeah…"

"Bobby and I have a lot to work on sometimes, but it's…it's a good marriage."

"That's good."

She looked into Chandler's eyes for a moment. It was obvious there was no point lying to him. He knew something was wrong. "It's…it's a horrible marriage!" 

As soon as she uttered those words, Chandler wrapped his arms her. They remained in their embrace for a few moments, before breaking apart once more. 

"I would divorce him, but I can't."

"Why not?"

"He, uh, well, I mean…I can't do that to Alex. He looks up to his father – to us."

"Yeah…"

"I mean, I don't only have my life to look after!" 

"That's…that's true. But, he'd understand. He's a smart kid. Plus, divorce isn't the worst thing that could happen to a kid. I've been there as a child, too."

"I know, it's just…I can't."

"All right…just one thing. If you can make your life easier, if you can help yourself and your son, promise me you'll do it?"

"What?"

"If there's a way to make the marriage easier – if you need to say yes to something _you _want to do or no to something you _don't _want to do, then say it."

Monica hesitated. "Yeah, okay. I – I promise."

"Thank you."

They fell silent once more, staring at each other. 

Monica broke the silence nervously, "You're not gonna…tell anyone about what we talked about, right?" 

"Of course not! Unless, you tell them what I told you."

"I wouldn't."

"I know. I - I feel like I can…talk to you," Chandler admitted quietly, "More than I can talk to the rest of the gang."

"Yeah…yeah, me too."

Unconsciously, they both moved in closer to each other, faces only inches apart. 

"You're a really good listener," Chandler whispered.

"So are you."

They continued to gaze at each other, until Monica leaned over and placed a timid kiss on Chandler's lips. He kissed back, wrapping his arms around her, and pushing her off of the arm of the chair and onto his lap. They continued to kiss, as the world around them stopped. They were hardly breathing, hardly moving, hardly thinking. The only thing they were aware of was the feel of lips against lips. Then, Monica broke the kiss, still gazing into Chandler's eyes.

"I should get back…I have work."

"Oh yeah, right. Me too."

Monica rose, and Chandler stood up a few moments after her. He followed her to the door, unaware of the foosball table in front of him, until he walked straight into it. He fell backwards in shock. 

"Oh my God," Monica said, as she helped Chandler up, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine."

"Oh, okay then…"

"Yeah."            

Monica opened the door, and then turned to Chandler once more. "So…I'll see you."

"Yeah, see you."

She walked out the door and closed it softly. Chandler sank down to the floor. 

_Okay, thanks for reading! Looks like it's back to work for me *sighs*. TBC soon. Please review, thanks! Hussles and kigges! (whoa, something went **majorly **wrong there…) _


	4. Chapter 4

**_Raindrops Keep Falling_** – Chapter 4

**_A/N:_**_ Mmkay, I'm in an ultra crappy mood, but I'm gonna pretend I'm not for the sake of this a/n. lol, today I walked to the supermarket that's like a mile away to visit my friend who works at the Starbucks there and I got soaked from the rain. Now, I'm on caffeine high from the caramel frappachino I had.  Great, I won't end up going to sleep till like 1 am. But, on the plus side, it was half off.;) Anyway, this chapter is rated pg-13 for slight sexual themes. Please read at your own caution. I don't want to be responsible for the corruption of today's youth, except that I kinda still am one so I guess, technically, I can't be responsible for corrupting my own kind, right? Ok, so it doesn't work that way, but I'm just going to keep pretending it does. Thanks to Yen (aka JenniGellerBing) for easing my anxiety about this chapter and hello to Michey Pishey just b/c I loverrr her and didn't forget to mention her in this a/n finally! Ok, Please read and review, thanks._

That night, Monica laid in bed, waiting for her husband to enter the bedroom. There was no reason to go to sleep. He would just wake her anyway. However, today, that didn't matter. She had another reason to stay awake. Her mind was still swirling from the events of that morning.

She had tried to hide her miserable life from her friends; put on a façade of cheerfulness, instead. Still, it had failed. Obviously, no one believed it. Firstly, she walked in on her friends talking about how miserable she seemed, and then, Chandler gave her that look that told her he knew she was unhappy. She saw that and took it as opportunity to admit everything, against her better judgment. But still, the only way things could get better was if she stood up to her husband. Chandler knew that, too. 

What he didn't know, however, was that she wasn't sure she could stand up to him. She had tried, of course, but her attempts had always proven futile. Her husband was, if nothing else, the most stubborn man in the world. In his mind, he had no flaws. Therefore, anyone who pointed them out was wrong. Monica had seen his rage in its entirety before; she didn't want it directed at her – not again.  

She turned her head towards the door, and watched as it slowly opened. Bobby entered. At first, he stumbled slightly, grabbing the door to catch himself before he fell. He laughed blankly, and walked in farther. His eyes swept the room, and then fell upon Monica. Her heart sped up, as his lips curved into a small smile. 

He was drunk again. That didn't surprise Monica, though. In fact, she couldn't remember a time when he hadn't been drunk around her in the past six years. Sure, he had quit when they first became serious, but he picked it up again a half a year later. For a fleeting moment, she wondered what in his life was so terrible that forced him to drink. Was it her? It couldn't be - she never nagged him, never argued – could it?

However, that thought left her mind as soon as he climbed onto the bed. She moved away from him slowly, although never breaking eye contact. As soon as she moved, he moved with her. She was at the end of the bed – there was nowhere else to go. She continued to look up at him, his small smile now replaced by a sly grin. Monica narrowed her eyes and glared at him. No matter what happened, she couldn't break eye contact. That was, after all, the first sign of weakness. 

They continued to stare at each other wordlessly. Seconds turned into hours, as Monica forced herself to only blink when absolutely necessary. Then, slowly, he inched closer to her. She in took a sharp breath, but still stared up at him, hoping her inward fear wasn't visible. He was hovering over her now; his body only inches away from hers. Part of her was screaming to break eye contact – to just close her eyes and allow him to do what he wanted. However, she had made a promise to Chandler, and, in turn, had made a promise to herself. She had to keep it.

His hands found the hem of her blouse. She still refused to break eye contact. His fingers began to unbutton the blouse, and she knew it was time. He couldn't go any further. He was scurrying to undo the button right below her breasts, when she took him by surprise and pushed his hands away. Fire flashed in his eyes, but she still didn't break eye contact. 

He glared at her for a few moments, before moving back to her blouse, this time, ripping the button off the shirt. She pushed his hands away again. Another bolt of lightning flashed in his eyes. He glared at her again, jaw set tightly. She glared right back at him. And then, she did what she had never done before. 

"Don't touch me."

His gaped at her for a few moments, not used to being denied. His hands then moved to her shirt once more, this time, ripping the rest of the buttons off in one quick motion. Monica pushed his hands away again.

"Don't touch me!"

He sat back and squinted his eyes. "I can do whatever I want."

"No."

"YES!" he screamed, leaning in and kissing her roughly on her lips. 

She pushed his head away and sat up. He pushed her down, causing her back to hit the bed board roughly. He gripped her shoulders tightly, leaving bruises where his fingertips squeezed her. Not a sound escaped her lips.  

He kissed her again, this time, forcing his tongue into her mouth. She allowed him a half a minute of access, the smell of stale alcohol and cigarettes on his breath making her nauseous. Then, she bit down roughly and defiantly on his tongue. He yelped and jumped back, holding a hand up to his mouth. She turned to get out of the bed, but he grabbed her around the waist with his right arm. She felt as if all the wind had been knocked out of her, as he swung her back on the bed.  

Panting, she looked up into his eyes, determined to regain eye contact. His green eyes stared back at her, twisted and cold. When had he changed from the man she used to love, into this cold-hearted demand? The memory of his eyes, combined with the question they brought out in her, would live within her forever. 

"Look," he began, as he once again hovered over her, "There are two ways we can do this."

Monica shook her head, "I'm not sleeping with you!" 

He continued, completely ignoring her last statement, "One: we can do it easily," he leaned his head down and whispered in her ear, "And pleasurably." 

She pushed him upwards. He smiled down at her, deciding to view her defiant attempts as a game. 

"Or," he continued in the same eerily calm voice, "We can do it the painful way." 

"No!"

"No, not painful?"

"No, never!"

He shook his head. "I gave you the choice." 

He pushed her down completely onto the mattress, before pinning her to it with his hands. She screamed and twisted underneath his grip, but he was too strong for her. She couldn't escape. Sitting on her waist, he let go with his hands and put his arms around her back, unclasping her bra as he moved. She continued to twist her upper body, but Bobby was unfazed. 

He took one of her nipples into his mouth, and bit it. She couldn't help the scream that escaped her lips. He laughed and leaned towards her. 

"I fight fire with _fire_." 

She again attempted to wriggle out of his grasp, but to no avail. He lifted his body a few inches from hers, as he slid off her jeans and panties. She immediately closed her legs in protest. He began nibbling at her neck, but she continued to sit still. Her heart was beating at an abnormally fast pace. She watched him as he slid his pants and boxers off. She had to escape. To leave her body and go as far away from the scene as she possibly could. But, it was impossible. She couldn't escape his grasp. …Or could she?

She continued to look into Bobby's eyes, but in her head, she blocked him out. Instead, she found herself back at Chandler's apartment. Chandler was holding her, whispering that everything would be okay. Bobby thrust his knee between her legs, separating them. Monica screamed in pain, but never broke eye contact. In her head, Chandler told her he was proud of her – she had stood up to her enemy.

She felt Bobby enter her roughly, but she saw Chandler smiling down at her. She never broke eye contact. Chandler held her and whispered that she had done a great job. As Bobby moved inside her, she argued that she hadn't actually succeeded. Chandler shook his head and kissed her on the forehead. She could hear Bobby's throaty moans in her ear. Chandler told her she had done as much as she could. Bobby moaned and shuttered in sexual ecstasy. Chandler was proud of her. Bobby pulled out and laid on his side, breathing heavily. She was proud of herself.   

Lol, my mom just told me that the electricity went out across the street. Huh, I wonder how long till ours goes out. Yes, Hurricane Isabel is taking her aggressions out on my area, but it's not actually so bad here. People are like so convinced that we're going to get off school tomorrow. People are stupid. (watch, we're going to end up getting off from school tomorrow just to make ME into the idiot) Anyways, please leave me a review. Thanks!:) I hope this wasn't just crap.:/ 


	5. Chapter 5

**_Raindrops Keep Falling_** – Chapter 5

**_A/N: _**_So – tired – can't *yawns* I shouldn't have stayed up to watch the Simpsons last night…hehe. I have to go read like now…I'm reading three books at the moment and it's kinda difficult to keep them all straight. For school, Grendel (it's like a companion to Beowulf…I guess. But it's author is known and it was written within the past 100 years…) and Tuesdays With Morrie (such a greatbook! I read it the summer before 9th grade and OMG I recommend it to everyone!) Then, for my SAT tutor (I have to read to work on recognizing sentence structure and stuff) I'm reading The Shinning …hehe I figure I need another reason to keep myself up all night.;) *makes room in her freezer* Yeah, so between the SAT tutor, driving lessons (omfg they're so not fun!), and just being a junior in high school, my updating time is quite limited. Oh, and usually I do it on weekends, but this past weekend was really crazy…with the holidays and all. However, here I am (slacking off homework for a change) and updating! I've been working on this series when I've had a few spare moments, but I've pretty much just been reworking the last few chapters (I'm compulsive and like to have at least 2 chapters ahead of what I've posted written), so that's what took me so long to post. Yeah, okay, wow, this is long. Please read and review, (that is, if it's still worth it…) thanks._

Chandler sat in his barkalounger, watching television and humming idly to himself. He felt content for the first time in months. Finally, the weight of his marriage had been lifted from his shoulders. He had shared his feelings with someone else, and now, they didn't seem so terrible. Someone understood him. _She _understood him. 

In the back of his mind, he was worrying about Monica, though. She was so miserable in her marriage. He wished he could think of some way to convince her to divorce her husband. Still, Monica refused to do it, and he knew that once Monica made up her mind, there was little he could do to change it. But, he didn't worry about it much. She seemed at least moderately happy, when circumstances didn't concern her husband. Besides, she was _Monica_. She was strong. She could handle anything. 

So, at that moment, thanks to her, the main thought on his mind was wondering how Bugs Bunny would escape Elmer Fudd this time. However, an urgent knock on the door forced Chandler to shut off the television and open the door. There was nothing he could to prepare himself for what was next. When he opened the door, he was shocked to his very core. 

"Kathy?" he whispered. 

"Yeah." She hugged herself nervously as she looked around the apartment. 

"Uh, well, come in."

She nodded and forced a small, gracious smile upon her face. He gestured for her to sit on the barkalounger, and he pulled up a green stool and faced her. 

"So, umm, what's up?"

"Nothing, just, I…" her eyes darted around the room, looking anywhere, aside from into Chandler's eyes, "I just wanted to see how you were doing."

Chandler's eyes narrowed. "Don't make small talk. You must have a reason for being here. Look, I gave you all the money I have, okay?! What more could you possibly want from me?!"

"It's not that, it's that…I - I think that our divorce might have been a mistake."

"Wha…?" 

"I know, I know, we got along horribly for the past year! But, I…I really miss you."

"You were the one who wanted the divorce in the first place!"

"I know, I know!" she stood up and began to pace, "I was angry and stupid, Chandler! I can't tell you how much I regret it." 

"I –" he stared at her, "I don't know what to say."

She looked up, momentarily fazed by his reply. Then, she stood up and walked over to him slowly. Just by the look on her face, Chandler knew her exact intensions as she stopped in front of him. He didn't move. Then, she leaned over and planted a soft kiss on his lips. Although Chandler was expecting it, he wasn't sure of what he wanted to do next. 

Part of him wanted to throw her down and make love to her until he couldn't move another muscle. However, there was another side of him that knew he no longer loved Kathy. Therefore, it would be wrong of him to take advantage of her, and he knew it. Instead, when she removed his lips from hers, he looked into her eyes. This wasn't what he wanted. He didn't want her anymore. He knew he wanted someone else – someone just barely touchable to him.  

So, as he stared into her eyes, he shook his head lightly. Kathy looked back at him, shocked. 

"You think just because you ended it, you can start it back up again?"

"No, it's just I thought we still loved each other!"

Chandler smirked at her. "There you go again."

"What?"

"Assuming you know just how I'm feeling just because you're feeling a certain way."

"Chandler!" she paused, "You know what, I don't have to stay here."

Chandler shrugged. "I agree. No one's making you."

"Look, this is your last chance! So, if you're playing hard to get, you'd better –"

"No thanks." 

Kathy looked down at her feet. "Fine then. I'm sorry things didn't work out."

"Yeah," he answered gruffly, "Me too."  

She walked to the door, as he followed close behind. She opened the door and then turned around, planting one last kiss on his lips, before she went out the door. 

Chandler stared at the door, shocked at what had just occurred. Day after day, he would replay the moment Kathy returned to him in his mind. Every time, they would end up together again, living happily ever after. However, he now realized being with Kathy would not be his 'happily ever after', but merely his escape from his most intense feelings and desires.   

No, something the day before had changed Chandler's view on his life and on his feelings. Something stronger than dreams had come to him the night before. Something called reality. 

Monica walked up to Joey and Chandler's apartment, holding Alex's hand loosely in hers. Chandler had called her the day before, invited her and Alex to dinner with he and Joey. Monica was happy to accept. She loved when Alex spent time with his "uncles". She hoped, perhaps, he would be able to find a father figure in them, since his real father was little to look up to. 

As soon as they entered, Alex sprinted right past Chandler, and headed straight towards the Playstation. He picked up the controller and immediately became enthralled in the game. Monica sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Won't you at least say hi to your Uncle Chandler?"

"Hi!" he called, eyes never leaving the television screen. 

Monica was about to scold him, when Chandler interrupted her. "Hey buddy." Then he turned to Monica, "It's okay, really. I was expecting that. I even turned on the game for him."

She chuckled. "All right, but he makes it seem like he doesn't have one of those video games at home," and then said louder, so that Alex could hear, "You're off the hook _this time_." 

"So, how's it going?"

"It's going fine," Chandler frowned at her and she shrugged, "Well, it's going, anyway."

He smiled slightly and grasped her hand. She gasped lightly with surprise. 

"You remember your promise…?"

"I do. And I'm keeping it."

"Good." 

They stared into each other's eyes for a bit longer, only jolting out of the mutual gaze by Alex's groan as he lost the game. 

"So, where's Joey?"

"Oh," Chandler looked away, "He can't make it today." 

"Oh?" Monica wondered, very mildly disappointed. 

"Yeah, he had to, uh, work." 

The truth of the matter was, however, that Chandler never told Joey to begin with. He was actually hoping to get a moment alone with Monica, so he could talk to her. He now realized, as she watched Alex's game and ruffled his hair, that it would be harder than he had bargained for.  

"Well, we should probably get going," Chandler urged.

"Aww, but I'm almost done this level!" 

"Yes, but it's getting late and we need to get home before your –" 

Monica stopped arguing when she saw the words "game over" dance their way onto the screen. Alex sighed and put down the controller. 

"So, where to?" Chandler asked, as he ushered them out the door.

"Pizza!" 

"Alex –"

"Pizza sounds great."

Monica titled her head and grinned at Chandler. He smiled back at her. 

"Yeah," she agreed absently, still watching Chandler, "Pizza sounds great."

After dinner, Chandler insisted upon seeing Monica and Alex to their house. On the train ride home, Alex fell asleep. So, as they walked up the stairs to her house, Chandler held the sleeping boy in his arms. When they entered, Chandler brought Alex into his room and laid him down on the bed. He watched from the door, as Monica dressed him in his pajamas, kissed his forehead tenderly, and shut off the lights. He realized, at that moment, just how grateful he was that Monica had Alex in her life. Chandler could see at that moment that Alex was one of the only things in her life keeping her sane. 

Monica turned to leave the room, and gasped softly when she noticed Chandler standing at the door. 

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you," he mumbled, as they headed down the stairs.

"It's ok. I thought you had gone downstairs."

"Nah, I wanted to watch you two," she blushed, "He's such a good kid."

Chandler sat down on the couch, while Monica headed towards the kitchen. 

 "He really is," she called from the other room, "I don't know what I'd do without him."

"Me neither," he muttered to himself. 

"What was that?" Monica questioned, as she brought two coffees into the living room.

He ignored her question. "I really love what you've done with the place. I feel like I haven't been her in ages!"

"Yeah, well…you kinda haven't. I'm always the one going into the city."

"Yeah…we should all be less lazy and come visit you."

Monica chuckled. "It's okay. I have to go into the city for work, anyway." 

"True, true."

Monica watched Chandler, as he mixed sugar into his coffee. He was right - she really didn't invite her friends over to the house much. She was always afraid, as she was at that very moment, that Bobby would come home, drunk. Then, they would all see just what Bobby was like now, and she was certain they would try to convince her to divorce him. In fact, there was a part of her that wanted to ask Chandler to leave. However, aside from the fear of being considered rude, another, more reckless part of her, wanted him to stay. She decided she would listen to that side, for a change.

"So," he began, "I guess I'll just tell you what I've been wanting to tell you all night."

"Yeah? What's that?" she asked, breathlessly.

"Well, Kathy came by today."

"Oh?" Monica's face fell for a moment, but she recovered quickly. However, it wasn't fast enough to hide from Chandler.

"Yeah, she, uh, wanted to get back together."

"I, umm, oh. I see. What did you - did you say?"

"I said no."

Monica sighed inwardly, despite herself. Even if there wasn't – couldn't be – anything between them, she wanted that option to always be open. Perhaps, that was slightly selfish, but she wanted it, nonetheless. 

"Yeah, I realized I didn't feel anything for her anymore."

"Ohh."

"Yeah, and you know why I realized that?"

"No, why?"

"Because of you. You and your advice."

"I didn't do much."

He grasped her hands again. "No, no! You did everything. You _listened_."

She smiled and touched his cheek. However, her finger lingered longer than she expected. She couldn't bring herself to pull away. The feel of his skin against hers was comforting, yet exhilarating, at the same time. Chandler felt the same way. Instead of moving away from her touch, Chandler brought his hand up to his face and rested it lightly on top of her hand. 

Chandler had no idea what was happening. It was as if his mind had completely fled from his head, as he leaned in and kissed her. She sighed, content on finally kissing him again. Monica hadn't noticed just how much she craved it, until she felt his soft lips upon hers again. Her eyes fluttered as his arms reached around her neck. However, after a minute, Chandler pulled back and gazed into her eyes.

"We shouldn't be doing this," he whispered.

"I know."

"But I really want to."

"Me too." 

"Mon, I," he licked his lips, and she held her breath, "I have feelings for you."

She let out the breath she was holding in. "You do?"

"Yeah, I do. That's why I said no to Kathy. That's how I knew I was over her."

"I, uh, I…"

"And I know," he continued, "That nothing can happen between us, but -"

Monica cut him off by kissing him passionately on the lips. Chandler leaned back,  as she continued, eagerly and hungrily, letting out all the emotions that she held pent up inside herself for so long. After a moment, he kissed her back with just as much passion, expressing the same confined feelings. At the moment in time, it was as if they had lived only for that one, magical kiss. 

Minutes turned to seconds, as Monica reluctantly pulled away from Chandler. He looked at her curiously, and a smile crept upon her face. She cupped his face in her hands before speaking once more.

"I have feelings for you, too."

He smiled. "I was hoping I interpreted that kiss right." 

"But what," Monica looked away, "What are we gonna do about our circumstances?"

"Well, you're not willing to leave him, right?"

She shook her head.

"Well, then, there's only one more option left."

"What's that?" she asked, pretty confident that she already knew the answer. 

"Do you think it's worth the risk?"

"I don't know."

"Well, I want you to think about," he replied before rising, "But I also want you to know one thing."

"What's that?"

"He might be able to give you a marriage and a roof over your head, but he can't give you the greatest gift that I have to give." 

"What's that?" she asked, heart beating rapidly.

"He can't give you love." 

Monica nodded, realizing that she had been hoping for that answer all along. It had been a vague dream that she never knew existed, re-instilled in her mind. She watched as Chandler headed for the door. She was about to stop him, when, to her horror, the doorknob turned. 

Bobby entered, his hair disheveled and tie hanging haphazardly from his neck. However, Monica noticed he didn't seem drunk. On the contrary, the only visible attribute of his manner was the strongly suspicious look he shot Chandler, as he walked past him. Still, Monica didn't worry much. Bobby was always suspicious of men who were around her, no matter how close of a friend they were. The irony of the situation, however, was that he had been right, for once. 

Chandler bid Bobby goodbye, wondering what he had done to make Bobby so suspicious. After all, he hadn't been in the house when they kissed. He was about to leave, when Monica's voice stopped him. He turned around and looked at her curiously. Bobby, in turn, stopped to scrutinize Monica.

"I'll take your offer."

Chandler smiled and nodded, before leaving the apartment. While he closed the door, he heard Bobby question her on what that exact offer was. Her answer didn't matter to him, though – she would come up with something. He was in love and everything was right with the world. 

**_A/N: _**_Uh, yeah, that's about it. I have to get back to reading and/or playing e-mail tag with Michey Pishey *hugs* loverr u! And no, Yen, u get no mention b/c u go online too late for my poor, exhausted brain!! (…she has a brain?!) *kicks the time difference* Oh, and I checked and hon, Boris IS dead. Lol, Ok, please leave a review, thanks!:)_


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